birthdays

So today I turned 22! It was a really good birthday. To be honest, I was somewhat dreading this day because after spending the summer with my boyfriend, Matt, it was time for him to go back to school. I also had this attitude of "nothing is that exciting after you turn 21." Part of me doesn't like that as you grow up you lose that childlike wonder and awe of turning another year older. My 10-year-old brother, Peter, absolutely LOVES his birthday. He starts talking about his birthday months in advance and this past year he prayed that the days before his birthday would go by fast but that his birthday would be slow. As far as he is concerned the world stops and he is THE reason for that day.

The illusion that my birthday stopped everyone in their tracks fell long ago, but as this day is drawing to a close, I feel so celebrated and loved by my family and friends. That is the point of birthdays...to celebrate life and remember God faithfulness. Even though this birthday lacked the fanfare of 21, it was simple, joyful and relaxing. I had a good amount of time this afternoon just to sit down and journal about this past year of life. Tonight I am thankful to be 22, to have graduated college and to have incredible family and friends who love me and point me more towards Jesus.

Birthdays celebrate life so cheers to that!

Restless Pursuit

"Men are in a restless pursuit after satisfaction in earthly things. They will exhaust themselves in the deceitful delights of sin, and, finding them all to be vanity and emptiness, they will become very perplexed and disappointed. But they will continue their fruitless search. Though wearied, they still stagger forward under the influence of spiritual madness, and though there is no result to be reached except that of everlasting disappointment, yet they press forward. They have no forethought for their eternal state; the present hour absorbs them. They turn to another and another of earth’s broken cisterns, hoping to find water where not a drop was ever discovered yet.” Charles Spurgeon

Therefore go...

Am I really graduating college in 2 weeks?! Definitely not ready to say goodbye to this phase of my life. I love Chapel Hill and every single thing about college and would do it all over again if I could. But what has made college so rich is the life-giving friendships I have formed and the community of believers here in at school. Every time I think about leaving this sweet haven and I get really, really sad, I think about what Jesus says to us as believers:

"All authority on heaven and on earth has been given to Me. Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit." Matthew 28:18-19

I think about Jesus telling His disciples that they must go...whether or not they feel ready. I am sure that they would all have preferred to remain with Him and with each other in loving community and fellowship. They were terrified of the unknown. But before telling them to go, Jesus says, "ALL authority in heaven and on earth has been given to Me." Without this declaration of Jesus' authority we could never venture out confidently. But He is with us, and He will go before us. In this bittersweet season of life I have been clinging to these promises. I would love to stay in Chapel Hill with all my friends and live in this community, but it is time to go. I feel like I have seen a glimpse of what heaven will be like because of how well I have been loved, encouraged and challenged by my friends as we have walked through this phase of life together. We have bared each others burdens, shared in each others joys, and cried in each others pain. I have been blessed abundantly and I know that the true feast lies ahead, but I am still sad. I know that many tears will still be shed about leaving, the goodbyes are coming, but regardless of how much I will miss Chapel Hill and all my sweet, sweet friends- He is good and He is faithful. And we will share in this community again for He is Risen! No matter where life takes me this side of heaven, I know that the best is ALWAYS still to come.

Rethinking the Beatitudes

I read this on a blog written by a wonderful woman named Margot, who works with Reality Ministries in Durham. She talks about what Jesus might tell us today- a way to distinguish our cultural values from His kingdom ones.

Blessed are those who aren’t fantastically attractive, because they have a treasure that’s found elsewhere.

Blessed are those who are overlooked at a singles bar, for they are actually the chosen ones.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for something other than becoming physically attractive, for they’ll be filled with what really satisfied.

Blessed are those who use their bodies to bless others, for they will be called God’s own.

Blessed are those whose eyes search for the best in others, for they will see God.

Blessed are those who suffer because they’ve made some of these choices, for they’ve got a better reward coming.

Love this. As a woman, I struggle so much with obsessing about the way I look. I spend so much time fixing up the outside- trying to perfect a body that will age, change, and eventually die. I will have nothing to show but wasted hours of time and mental energy. My prayer recently has been that the Lord would take away this obsessive desire for outward beauty, and would help me control my mind- which often can be my greatest enemy. I believe lies- that if I could only look look a certain way I would finally be content. WRONG. It never works that way. I challenge you to find one woman in this world who is completely content with the way she looks. Perfection doesn't exist because we are people who will never be content this side of heaven.

Jesus offers hope. He will empower us to find victory in this area that for so many women distracts and defeats us.

Laminin

He literally holds us together. This video is about 9 minutes long but it's worth watching!